Booptopia...

Untitled thoughts

2010-02-21T22:20:00.000-08:00

I haven't written on this blog in so long, probably due to the fact that I've been writing a TON outside of the cyber world. I've been writing poetry, music, stories, you name it, I've been writing it, and I thought I'd share with you a tidbit of what I've been up to! It doesn't have a title, but it's a sampler!

A palette knife deftly peeling the spirals away,
Gone away,
Gone today,

Until there's nothing left but a hole in the wall,
Not at all,
No, nothing at all

Through this hole, I can see that the leaves have fallen
Off of the moon,
And into the gutters.

I am soaking in my own milky puddle of moonlight,
Trying to regain some composure to the patterns
Of my self-destructive habits.

To release one's own self to the point of suffocation
Is my cross to bear,
Well, it would be,

Were it not for the winds that hold me up.

Imagination...

2009-11-24T23:10:00.000-08:00

...cannot be confined.

I'm Famous!

2009-11-10T10:15:00.001-08:00

So this was a mockery ad that was an assignment for my photographing diversity class, where we document and photograph issues that are a part of our every day lives, I think you can figure out what this one's about. All the type on there was taken from actual advertisements from the 50s, that's the best (and scariest) part of this whole thing.

And now it is hanging up in a display at my school to show what this class is all about, pretty sweet, huh? So, I guess I'm not famous, but it's kinda cool to be walking down the hallways and see your face randomly...

The World is my Oyster!

2009-11-08T23:48:00.001-08:00

So, in my newly found freedom I've been attempting at documenting the every day life of me, so I thought I'd give you some samples of some of my personal favorites...

I got to join in on a weekly tradition, and had a lovely (and EARLY) breakfast with Colie and Debs... it was VERY cold! But nice and toasty inside :)

I had a great time at Sugarhouse Park on such a beautiful day! Glad I was able to get so many good shots on one of the last warm days of fall.

An unforgettable view from the bridge...

I hope everyone out there is also having as much fun as I am!
Happy Adventuring!

The Tides of Change

2009-10-26T20:32:00.001-07:00

Life is like Swiss Cheese. But is Swiss Cheese defined by the physical matter of it? Or the holes in the whole of it? Or should we forget about all that and focus on the flavor?

"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference; Living one day at a time; Enjoying one moment at a time; Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace."

Those words take on a whole new meaning when you experience them, live and in color.

You see, the only time that matters is now, because there simply is no other time that exists. The past and future cannot be proven.

What about memories and pictures?

Memories are but electronic pathways in the brain, and pictures are but illusions printed on a page.

Only is it when we can accept the given moment for what it is, and simply experience it and let it be. . . When we can embrace it in its purest form and not get caught up in thought and judgment, only then can we find clarity. Mindfulness is the answer to all of life's many questions, which is what I discovered for myself. You can listen to people tell you you're going to be ok, but it doesn't really mean anything until you come to that realization for yourself. And once you do have that realization, trust me, it's worth it!

Here's to Good Times, Good Food, and Good PLUs!

2009-08-29T22:38:00.000-07:00

It's not very often I get to see my Aunt, Uncle and cousins in New Hampshire, but boy, it sure is a treat when I do. It's always like coming back to a home away from home, in a way. The best way I can describe it is like putting on your favorite old sweater after its been in a cedar chest all summer. It's nice to be able to put on something safe and familiar on a cold day.

Our first outing was filled with tall ships, Portsmouth and the beach!

The beach is beautiful...

...even if it's crowded with crazies.

A stop to the Ben and Jerry's factory is always a sweet diversion from the summer heat...

Sweet ride, man.

No secret ingredients around here...

While waiting for our tour, we enjoyed ice cream in the shade, among other things.

We waited a while for the tour, but I'd say it was worth it.

Quite a pleasant place to spend the day with the fam.

They even had a flavor graveyard!

The local farm stand is quite a little paradise!

We went to the farmer's market, so charming! Complete with story time and honey sticks! Yum!

It's only in New Hampshire you'll see a Blue Heron on a golf course during a riveting game of mini golf, where Mom got TWO holes in one!

Colie and I reach a point during every family vacation to take silly pictures of ourselves, we even got mom in on the silliness this time!

Star gazing is a classic pastime, and the front yard is a perfect spot to lounge in an Adirondack with a blanket, of course.

I wish I could say this was the Perseid meteor shower, but, it's really just star trails.

And of course some blueberry picking was in order.

Anne Marie informed me that this was her "blueberry castle".

Mom and Colie trying to keep cool on one of the hottest days we had while we were there.

Some breathtaking views could be found on this blueberry adventure!

Sitting while picking is recommended, whenever possible, especially in that heat!

Wild and all naturale is the only way to go!

And it wouldn't be a proper trip to New Hampshie without a shummy bluberry pie!

Thanks for a memorable trip Uncle Erie Pie, Aunt Maria, the "little dudes" (that aren't so little anymore), Twizler, Sprinkle, and Jello!

I'm looking forward to....

2009-08-01T09:01:00.000-07:00

1. Getting on a plane with my family, and making the long journey to New Hampshire.
2. Seeing those kids again after so long, and catching up again with that aunt and uncle that were almost like a third set of parents when I was growing up.
3. Going to the General Store and having some of the best subs this side of the Mississippi in the oval.
4. Waking up to everyone having coffee on the porch.
5. Going antiquing, hopefully I will find something good!
6. Listening to my parents plan their future and how they're going to move there.... Maybe.
7. Going to the beach, ah, how I love, and have missed the beach!
8. Eating some of the freshest sea food I've had in a while.
9. Going on hikes through the neighborhood.
10. Having a campfire in the back yard.
11. Seeing how many things we can cross off the chalk board.
12. Rekindling those old jokes, and forming new ones that will last forever.
13. Going to the dump!
14. Having some of the best home cooked meals made by my mom and aunt Maria... mmmm!
15. Spending time with my family, and NOT doing homework.
16. Taking pictures and documenting what will be a great, and much needed vacation.

But I have to survive finals week first.

Chickens!

2009-07-22T14:32:00.000-07:00

My mom has this funny obsession (well, maybe more like DEEP PASSION) for chickens. They can be found numerous places around the house, bowls, calendars, towels, from huge porcelain statues as a main display in our front window, to the salt and pepper shakers on our dining room table. We even used to find our neighbors chickens hanging out in our trees, yes, in our trees. It's quite alarming to see the silhouette of such a large bird perched on a wilting tree branch for the first time. So if anyone ever asks you, "why did the chicken cross the road?" well, now you know the REAL answer. I guess they caught on to the good chicken vibes my mom has.

So, it only makes sense that we girls of the fam. (me, my mom, and sister) went to the Annual Salt Lake City Chicken Coop Tour, where you get to go around to numerous houses around the city and check out the scoop on their chicken coop. The owners are there to talk to and to give advice to anyone wanting to know, it was very interesting, not to mention fun! We saw chickens and coops of all shapes and sizes.

Don't get lost Colie!

Some lived the high life with beautiful coops, automatic doors, and with freedom to roam as they pleased.

Others had divine inspiration.

Some had their own personal body guards.

We got to see some pretty beautiful birds, and we all learned a lot. So, "why don't we have chickens yet?" I kept asking myself. Well, I guess we'll just have to wait and see what happens next spring. But I'm sure that when we do get them, it will all be worth it.

Lovely Lavendy Festy!

2009-07-16T13:39:00.000-07:00

Last weekend, I got to spend time with just me and my older sister at Mona's annual Lavender Festival!

There were so many beautiful, beautiful flowers (including some roses in colors I've never seen before!) and some great insects I spent a bit chasing around.

We got a tour of their distillery where we learned all about the essential oils extraction process, and watched a video about how they're going to change the face of medicine and therefore save the world! ('merica!)

And then, of course there was the breath-taking lavender fields!

We got pretty thirsty out there in the July heat, so we bought some AMAZING lavender ice cream, yum!

It was a great day to spend with my big sister!

Fourteen Years....

2009-06-17T21:38:00.001-07:00

It's been fourteen years today....

Fourteen years of being a family.

Fourteen years of best friends.

Fourteen years of goofing around.

And it's days like today, a day for remembering the past, I realize some things will never change.
Like the close bond between a mom and her daughters.

And all the fun I have with my big sis.

Here's to fourteen years! Happy anniversary Mom, Mark, and Company!

2009-04-14T20:04:00.000-07:00

Here she is, the newest member of the family:

She doesn't have a name yet, but she sure is a cutie! She was an Easter surprise, my Uncle Larry's newest buddy. He got her not long ago, but it didn't take long for us all to fall in love.

And of course, Larry is thrilled to have this little piece of joy to come home to, who wouldn't?

Barty loved her...Not only did I get to spend Easter with a puppy, but I got to spend some time with some pretty great people too, which hasn't happened for a while. I think holidays are a great excuse to do something with family and friends.

Mom and Mark

My lovely Gramma

And of course, Jennafer, she's practically one of the family too!

My cutie sister Colie...

And my favorite Barty in all the land...
It truly was a great Easter Sunday.

The last snow...

2009-03-25T08:31:00.000-07:00

So it's technically spring, right...?

And it's been snowing for a few days now....

Each morning I wake up and see that it's still snowing, I just tell myself:

"Today's the last day it's going to snow this year!"

Making it so much easier to enjoy.

The first breath of spring...

2009-02-27T10:30:00.000-08:00

...melts away the frost of winter. The smell of earth, and grass rejuvenates the soul. Tulips sprouting a whisper of a promise of beauty to come. While winter can be beautiful, spring is a reward worth looking forward to.

A time for a lightening of the spirit, a rebirth of the soul. As the birds find their way back, waking me every morning singing out, "Celebrate! Celebrate!" It's a universal understanding of creatures great and small as the weighted blanket of winter is lifted off of our shoulders.

I am so grateful to be a part of mother natures greatest makeovers.

Another day older...

2008-12-09T12:07:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow is my Birthday, as mostly everyone knows by now. And I'm excited, but it's not just any ol' birthday. I'm turning 20 tomorrow. I'm entering a new decade, which is kindof a big deal. When I turned 10, it wasn't a huge deal, it was my golden birthday (I turned 10 on the 10th) but other than that, it seemed like just another ol' birthday. I know I've technically been an adult for a few years now, but I feel like now it's legit. It's for real this time.

I've lived a quarter of my life! And Lots of things have changed. But at the same time, I'm still me. Same wierdo goof ball that still acts like a little kid.

I've come a long way, I've learned a lot of lessons, accomplished many things. I've survived through the tough times, so far, and I've made mistakes, but it's all been worth it! Today my mom said, "I hope you enjoy you're last day as a teenager!" A part of me feels like I'm leaving my childhood behind, and I can never go back. Which is both a good thing and a bad thing, but I also know that it will always be with me. That girlish charm that is so prevalent in the way I view the world won't go away just because I'm one day older. I mean, age is just another title, right? Just another way to identify oneself. So no sweat, I guess it is just another ol' birthday after all.

It's about time...

2008-11-12T21:06:00.001-08:00

It's been about 15 years since someone threw my mom a party for her birthday... which may not seem like a terribly long time for some, but it means a REALLY long time for me! The last time someone threw a party for my mom was when I was about three years old!

So about a month ago, my mom and I were chit-chatting about the holidays and the topic of our birthdays came up. Both of our birthdays are in December, so we're used to many, many parties during the holidays. When I heard just how long it's been since my mom had been given a party, I knew that something must be done!

Despite the fact that my mother's birthday is in the eye of the holiday storm, we're pulling out all the stops. (Which is easy to do when planning a party on someone else's budget, because it wouldn't be much of a party if it were on my dime, I'll tell you that much!) balloons, luminaries, over-the-top decorations, a breath-taking cake, and champagne of course, and.... well, we don't

want to give it all away now do we? I figure that for twenty years my mom has always made my birthday a special day, despite the holiday madness. And NEVER has she ever grouped my birthday and Christmas gifts together, which is something that I really appreciate. So I figure it's about time that I give a little bit back.

We've just started to talk about all the details for the party, so we're not too far into it yet. (Although, I admit, I've inherited my mom's awesome party planning skills, and I've already got a few ticks up my sleeves...) But it's about time to put together a guest list, and I've just about finished the invitations that I made myself, and I'm pretty dang proud of them! My first legitimate encounter with photo shop, and I feel as if I know a lot already! I thought I'd post a sample or two of what I've come up with. Hope you like them as much as I do!

This was my original idea, but a little too pixelated for my taste.

Here's the final product, same idea, different (and better quality) picture.

Ahhh, this time of year...

2008-10-12T00:23:00.000-07:00

Fall, for me, is my time of rebirth... The silliness of summer is behind me... (supposedly) I feel the most alive on those crisp apple days, wrapped up tight in a cozy sweater. I'm devastated I won't be able to join my family on their trek to New Hampshire, for it is truly the best place to celebrate fall.

I feel as if fall is the quiet before the storm, the storm of the holidays, and the fambly time. I'm always my most creative, and some of my best friendships started in the fall. I wrote previously about the first snow of the year (at least the first snow in my book), I was driving home from Barty's. When I got home, I satin the car, for a long, long time. I conversed with my thoughts as I watched the snow collect on the windshield and fall, sluggishly creating a fortress.

Its actually one of my favorite things to do... But I like it much better if there's someone else with me. Like the night I spent hours talking with one of my best of friends, Meg. That was the night I felt that switch flip, the "friends for life" switch that I am still so glad for today. The night my other best-friend-for-life, Tina, and I talked about life ahead... We were just girls in High School, and she was a mom in the making. I felt another switch that night, I felt my crazy care-free friend growing up and being responsible without me. There are so many switchy-flippy nights that came to my head, and made me realize just how far I really have come... Sometimes you don't realize how much things have changed unless you take a minute to stop and look around.

So I guess fall is when big pieces come together for me, when old things end, and new things sprout. I guess fall is for us phoenixes, to rise again from the ashes. As nature all around me is going out with a bang, I'm coming to life. No switches yet... other than the dropping out of college thing, but we still have time... we always have time.

What's This?! What's This?!

2008-10-12T00:09:00.000-07:00

Tonight, as I drove home from Barty's, I discovered that it was snowing! There was enough snow that I had to brush off the car! It's not totally unlikely for it to snow in Utah, even in October, and it was really cold today... although, it did jumpstart those Christmas jitters!

But wait- I haven't even really gotten prepared for Halloween, let alone Christmas! It was only last week that I decided it's finally fall. I felt like Jack Skellington, on The Nightmare Before Christmas, all out of sorts, but in a pleasantly and unexpected way...

Not quite sure where to point my holiday compass to, all I have to say is, "Happy Holidays!"

Mr. and Mrs. Chicken

2008-09-18T12:29:00.000-07:00

Fall is my favorite time of year. Fall is a time that I find inspiration. Much of nature, on it's last limbs, going out with a bang, saving the best part for last. Fall is a time where transition is all around you, and is a beautiful sight to behold. And there's nowhere else in the world I'd rather experience fall than in Mont Vernon, New Hampshire.

It was a very sad day when my Aunt Maria, Uncle Eric, and cousins Olivia, Tony and Annemarie had to move away. Both families were so much apart of each other, living five minutes away for a majority of my life, it seemed we'd almost taken it for granted. I often think about them, and hardly talk to them like we used to. But I always miss them the most when the smell of Fall hits the air.

When we do go and visit, it's just like old times. You'd think things would be different, with the kids growing up and changing, but they're basically the same. All the same jokes, same punch lines, same nicknames... including the beloved "Chicken". It started many years ago, when I was a kid. My step dad Mark does a miraculous impression of a chicken and chases you around, and you can't help but squeal with delight. The tradition lives on, but my cousins, who are much younger than me, are now the torch bearers. But everyone in the family still refers to Mark as Chicken.

It was actually at my Aunt and Uncle's beloved "Green House" where my parents said their "I-do's". He wasn't deemed chicken just yet, but it was the day that he officially became my dad. Not a replacement, by any means, but he's been there for me when I needed him, which has been alot since I moved out. I never knew how much my parents meant to me until I didn't have them instructing, lecturing, and doing lots of other stuff that I was completely oblivious of. Now that I'm really really on my own, not going to school, trying to make a name for myself, a good evening spent at home with the rents can often be just what I needed. When Mark married my mom, he married all of us, and I've certainly kept his hands full of things to do, fix, clean-up, take care of.... take your pick. And the sad part is how much I took advantage of him, without even knowing it. I'm starting to realize how much he sacrifices for me every day, and at the time when I need him most, I feel a little bit undeserving. I know he loves me, and I know he is happy to help me out whenever I need it.

How can this sort of debt be repaid?

And what would a Chicken be without his Mrs. Chicken? What would I be without her?

Freedom is a beautiful thing, but it's also really hard sometimes not having someone there all the time to help. I don't know if I could handle it without my mom giving me her love, her pep talks, her occasional check up phone calls. Not to mention her home-cooked meals... How lucky am I to have two great parents like these? They love and support and give unconditionally.

Isn't there a way to give something back?

Fall time in New Hampshire not only beckons me, but my whole family. These parents of mine, would love nothing more than to up and move to New Hampshire. It's where they belong, and it's been calling their names for a long, long time. But they haven't moved there because of me... I tell them all the time that I'll be fine out here, but we all know that I'd be fine, until I'm not. I'd love to move away from here, and live close to my parents where I know they'd be happy, building their dream house near the ocean. Mark could sail on his boat that hasn't been used since my parents got married... If I could give them one gift, it would be their dream life in New Hampshire by the sea. I can drop almost everything, almost. I can say goodbye to the friends I hardly see or talk to, the places, the job, but I can't say goodbye to my best friend. To the one I love the most. My parents can't leave me, and I can't leave him. So the one way to repay them, for all they do, isn't happening today. All I can do for now is be thankful, and hope that someday, at least part of this wish can come true.

As long as you're happy...

2008-09-05T12:48:00.000-07:00

That's what my mom said when I told her I was thinking about dropping out of college. Not, "WHAT?!!!" In fact, there was no arguing about it. Simply, "I'm not happy with any of my classes, I don't feel good about the direction I'm headed, I feel my life calling me elsewhere."

Of course there was the classic, "I just want to make sure you're not making this decision for the wrong reasons." We talked about the pros and cons, and I made my decision. I was skeptical at first, thanks to society burning the thought of "quick decisions are never rational ones" into my brain. And, of course, I can always go back...

But for some reason, I have the feeling that I won't, at least not any time soon. I'm sure my mom is hoping and praying that I will go back next semester (which is saying a lot, because praying's not her thing... at least, not in the traditional sense) But who knows what will happen in the future? The road is my highway!

Where to now? My mind wanders off (as it so often does) to Italy, Spain, France, England, Japan! And then reality kicks back in... money... so wonderful when you have lots of it, and my worst enemy when I don't. Where does money come from? Certainly not trees, but maybe, o ya, a job! Which my current one isn't making ends meet, so I search elsewhere. A photography studio perhaps? Declined once already, but still determined to continue on! (After I've had a good cry and some chocolate, of course) Learning from my incredibly obvious mistakes and start over. Did I really think I'd get the first job I applied for? (well, yes, actually, seeing as the exact words were, "we'd love for you to work here, come by the office and we'll fill out all the paperwork and get you started!")

My first bittersweet taste of living the life of the artist... Somewhat humiliating, but what I've dreamed about all my life. A slap in the face that really woke me up yelling, "HEY! Why so depressed? You're living your dream years before you ever thought you would! Now stop moping and take advantage of the opportunities waiting out there for you!"

I guess it took me a while to realize what my life's become, because it's not anything like I planned. Life never is. Expectations often lead you to the dead end of disappointment. So, when I have kids, I'm not going to ask them what they want to be when they grow up, or what they're plans are, I'll ask them if they're prepared to be surprised. I know I've never been one to follow the map my parents so graciously layed out for me, but I wouldn't be me if I didn't listen to my inner self and do whatever it takes to make myself happy.

So mom, I know you're probably worried about me. Even if everything's perfectly fine, you're worried about it because there's nothing wrong. (and I love you for that) but I'm going to hold you to your word: "As long as you're happy..."

Don't worry,

I'm happy.